Holding two spaces for people with stories of survival matters, it also matters for the workers who listen, stay in the moment, maintain vigilant and focused on a delicate balance of life itself.
This is beautiful how you articulate it. The similarities of 'discipline of attention' that focuses on humanity feels like the practice of those who work with people across all professions.
I found working these areas had made me realize how precious life is with all its challenges. Thank you for writing such a thoughtful comment, it deeply resonates.
This is an astonishing read Kat. I can't imagine the trauma for both participants. 'Holding Two Spaces' is beautiful in a raw way that just fits the post.
Thank you, Julia, yeah that's the work. Jodie will stay with me forever that is for sure. Incredible survivor for sure. 'Holding Two Spaces', feels like the right language to describe this type of emotional heartache while continue to work with the person.
Katerina, “holding two spaces” gives language to the sacred and brutal complexity of frontline care: staying fully present to Jodie’s terror while also managing the grief your own body remembered. The details of the blanket, food, warm Milo, body mapping, forensic care, and the repeated insistence that Jodie remain in focus show how safety is built through attention when someone’s life is still unfolding at the edge. Your piece also honors the worker’s interior life without making Jodie’s story serve it, which is part of what makes this reflection so careful. Grateful for the rigor, tenderness, and restraint you bring to trauma education and the human cost of remaining present.
Thank you for these kind words, I appreciate it. Yes addressing immediate needs first is very important and this is something we emphasise in practice. Attending to the human needs first, resist pathologising and deficit language, Jodie and others in her shoes deserve it and need it.
I suspect you know what I am talking about Rev Kevin when I say, 'holding two spaces'. Is this something you encounter in your line of work? I've spent a lot of my time in mortuaries and funeral homes providing bereavement counselling, that's a difficult space too, but I loved it.
Katerina, I do recognize “holding two spaces,” especially in pastoral care and in leadership moments where someone’s immediate need has to remain at the center while the room is carrying grief, memory, fear, or history. The settings differ; the discipline of attention feels familiar. Before analysis, explanation, or even repair, people often need their humanity protected through the most basic forms of care: warmth, food, presence, safety, language that does not reduce them to what happened.
Your emphasis on resisting pathologizing and deficit language feels essential there, since the person in front of us deserves to be met as a whole human being before anyone tries to make meaning from their pain. I can understand why bereavement work in mortuaries and funeral homes would be difficult and deeply loved, since those spaces require honesty, reverence, and a very steady kind of care.
This is beautiful how you articulate it. The similarities of 'discipline of attention' that focuses on humanity feels like the practice of those who work with people across all professions.
I found working these areas had made me realize how precious life is with all its challenges. Thank you for writing such a thoughtful comment, it deeply resonates.
This is an astonishing read Kat. I can't imagine the trauma for both participants. 'Holding Two Spaces' is beautiful in a raw way that just fits the post.
Thank you, Julia, yeah that's the work. Jodie will stay with me forever that is for sure. Incredible survivor for sure. 'Holding Two Spaces', feels like the right language to describe this type of emotional heartache while continue to work with the person.
Katerina, “holding two spaces” gives language to the sacred and brutal complexity of frontline care: staying fully present to Jodie’s terror while also managing the grief your own body remembered. The details of the blanket, food, warm Milo, body mapping, forensic care, and the repeated insistence that Jodie remain in focus show how safety is built through attention when someone’s life is still unfolding at the edge. Your piece also honors the worker’s interior life without making Jodie’s story serve it, which is part of what makes this reflection so careful. Grateful for the rigor, tenderness, and restraint you bring to trauma education and the human cost of remaining present.
Thank you for these kind words, I appreciate it. Yes addressing immediate needs first is very important and this is something we emphasise in practice. Attending to the human needs first, resist pathologising and deficit language, Jodie and others in her shoes deserve it and need it.
I suspect you know what I am talking about Rev Kevin when I say, 'holding two spaces'. Is this something you encounter in your line of work? I've spent a lot of my time in mortuaries and funeral homes providing bereavement counselling, that's a difficult space too, but I loved it.
Katerina, I do recognize “holding two spaces,” especially in pastoral care and in leadership moments where someone’s immediate need has to remain at the center while the room is carrying grief, memory, fear, or history. The settings differ; the discipline of attention feels familiar. Before analysis, explanation, or even repair, people often need their humanity protected through the most basic forms of care: warmth, food, presence, safety, language that does not reduce them to what happened.
Your emphasis on resisting pathologizing and deficit language feels essential there, since the person in front of us deserves to be met as a whole human being before anyone tries to make meaning from their pain. I can understand why bereavement work in mortuaries and funeral homes would be difficult and deeply loved, since those spaces require honesty, reverence, and a very steady kind of care.